lonered | (no subject)

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(no subject)

[for

the_tailor]

[It's... it's been a while. That's really the only thought Keith can safely consider as the mission begins. The Blade and Voltron collaborate, of course, but they've been running in different parts of the galaxy, trying to maximize what resources they have. So it's been quite a while since he's seen the others, since he's been back to the Castle or even closer than a brief video call across the lightyears.

He's had a lot of time to think, really, a lot of time to himself to ruminate on thoughts that he tries his very best to bat away. Thoughts that are wrapped up in emotions and feelings that Keith doesn't really know how to untangle at all. Not surprising. It's never really been his strong suit. As intense as his emotions can be, as volatile, they tend to get the better of him rather than he of them. It's the same old story.

And maybe that's why, he realizes, he always reacted so strongly to Lance. It was too much, too complicated, to try to unravel the varying feelings the other boy drew out in him -- exasperation and confusion, sure, but something warmer and softer, in those rare and precious moments when they were drowning in their own manufactured tension. After some time apart he's finally realized where that tension comes from, on his side.

Which makes things way too complicated. Because how the hell is he supposed to deal with having feelings for Lance, falling for Lance, when Lance... well. When he's watched Lance literally flirt his way through the universe girl by girl. But here's Keith and his stupid traitor heart feeling this way anyway.

He's torn, therefore, when it's him and Lance sent off in the Red Lion on this particular joint mission. Part of him has missed the other so much it's a relief to see him again. Part of him is so twisted up that he doesn't know which way to go. So he focuses on the mission. He's quieter than usual, even. Focus. Keep to their orders, keep to what needs to be done. It's fine.

Until the whole thing goes south. They spring an old and unexpected trap -- a mine that emitted some sort of pulse that knocked most of Red's systems straight out. The landing hadn't been pretty, but Lance had managed to set it down in a way that didn't kill them at least. The planet, the outpost, is supposed to be abandoned, at least. Less good is how chilly is it, and with Red disabled, well, it's getting chillier and chillier. At least they've got the beacon working. Eventually help will come, but it could be a while. And in the meantime... they're alone.

Together.

Keith has gone for silence, because he doesn't know where to begin.]

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Apparently that's exactly what I can do.

[Because that's what he did. Because he's an idiot and ugh he's never going to be able to look at Lance again, is he? Which is sad. He likes looking at Lance. It's a nice view and he--

Damn it those thoughts help nothing. Stop.

He's glaring at the wall now like it's personally insulted him.]

Well, just because you can do it doesn't mean you should do it!

[Now that his system reboot has gotten to his limbs as well, he strides right over. Nowhere to run now, Keith.]

You... You just... Look, if you did that just to make fun of me...

I know okay. I know I shouldn't have done it!

[Keith snaps, turning around to face Lance only to realize that oh. He's close. Shit. Keith presses his back right up against the wall, like maybe he can disappear straight into it.]

...what? How would that even... I'm not trying to make fun of you.

Because--you know! Because of how I feel!

[It's the only explanation, right? Keith must have seen right through him.]

How you feel about what?

[Okay, Lance. He's really confused right now. Super confused. And he doesn't like it at all. The confusion, or the unpleasant knot of anxiety in his stomach. He kissed Lance. Lance is definitely weirded out by it.]

I'm sorry, okay?

About you! Duh! I mean, even if you weren't making fun of me, and it was just some kind of pity kiss or something...

[He still can't believe that Keith kissed him because he liked him.]

What are you even talking about?!

[Keith is staring at him, mouth agape for a minute while he tries to do the mental math on this.

Though all at once his expression change, defensiveness dropping in favor of a genuine confusion, oddly vulnerable in a way that Keith never lets himself appear.]

How... how do you feel about me?

I-- Wait, you... Wait, wait, wait! Hold it! You kissed me without even knowing?

[Because that throws a whole wrench into any theory he's had so far.]

I still don't know because you aren't answering my question!

[What is going on here Lance, please please help him understand because he has got nowhere to run right now and it's a problem.]

Ok, no, you started this, you have to go first! If you weren't kissing me out of pity or to make fun of me, then why did you kiss me?

[Even now, Lance still feels kind of terrified to blurt out to him how he really feels.]

Is this some bizarro universe where people kiss for weird mysterious reasons?! Isn't there only one reason you kiss someone... because you want to kiss them? Because I wanted to kiss you...

[Why are you making this so impossible, Lance? Keith thinks it has to be a unique talent. If Lance is going to hate him for this can he just get to hating him for it and stop torturing him?? That'd be much kinder.]

[It's a Lance talent. Look, for all his bluster and claims that he's the one going around breaking hearts, it's always been his heart getting broken. Practically no one ever wants to kiss him.]

I thought... I... I mean, up until now, I'd thought you still kind of hated me.

I never hated you, idiot.

[The romance is overwhelming. Keith is sulking, crossing his arms over his chest defensively now.]

But I don't know what else you want me to say, Lance. You made me admit it. I've admitted it. I said I was sorry. I don't...

[He just doesn't. He's confused and isn't sure why Lance hasn't told him to go to hell and dropped the subject already instead of drawing it out. It's starting to hurt. He drops his gaze again.] I don't know what you want from me.

I'm--...oh, quiznak... Soy un idiota...

[Yeah, Lance is just gonna bounce between three languages there.]

...I want you to come in closer so I can kiss you back.

[Keith barely understands Lance in one language!!

Except actually, when the other boy finally gets that last bit out, that is blessedly clear. Keith's gaze jerks back up to Lance to stare at him for a moment like he's sure he heard wrong.]

Oh.

[So. That sounds way too good to be true, but Keith uncrosses his arms, slowly leaning away from the wall, inching closer.]

...really?

Really. Because, ummm... I really want to kiss you too. I kind of have for a really long time.

[He admits it sheepishly.]

Oh.

[Again. Like this is... not where his talents lie, clearly. But his heart is tripping over itself to beat in his chest now. Lance wants to kiss him? Lance wants to kiss him!

Why are they not kissing?

That's the last thought Keith has before he closes the distance left between them, winding his arms around Lance's shoulders, taking a breath to steady himself.]

Then kiss me already.

[Please?]

Gladly.

[He leans in, eagerly capturing Keith's lips in his own now that his worries have melted away. This isn't a joke or a prank. Keith likes him. The boy he's been crushing on since the Garrison. Years of pent up longing goes into the kiss as he pulls Keith flush against him.]

[Oh thank god the talking is over. That was awful. He never wants to do that again. Ever.

However the kissing? He could happily do that for a long, long time thank you. His arms tighten around Lance in turn and he steps in closer, happy to mold himself up against him as he kisses him, murmuring a soft, appreciative sound straight to Lance's mouth.

Why have they not been doing this forever again?]

[Because the two of them have been idiots, that's why.

He happily keeps up the kiss, instinctively raising his hand to run through Keith's hair before he realizes with some annoyance that he's still wearing gloves.

Reluctantly, he parts from Keith just a few inches.]

Soooo, the sun's going down and it's getting chilly, how about we go back to my place?

[And he motions with his head towards Red.]

[Lance is... the hugest dork. But he's also really really cute and okay that is lame but also stupidly charming. Keith is probably in trouble if he's thinking like that, isn't he?

Still there's the beginning of a smile on his face as he nods.]

Yeah, okay.

[Works for Keith. Just... let him steal another quick little kiss? Tiny one. Then he'll force himself to step back, reaching out to snag up one of Lance's hands in his before tugging him off and towards the lion.]

[Lance likes that smile. He wants more of that. Keith smiles are really up there on his favorite things to see list. Probably in the top three, honestly.

It isn't long before they're inside of the lion and Red closes her jaw. She's still mostly offline, diagnostics running, but at least she can do that simple movement and keep the cockpit not freezing. As soon as they're in, Lance yanks off his gloves, reaching up to finally run his fingers through Keith's hair.]

You have... no idea how long I've wanted to do this for.

[Keith really isn't expecting the fingers in his hair at all, but that doesn't stop him from leaning into the touch, like some affection-starved kitten looking for more attention. ...he'd hate that comparison, but it's not inaccurate.]

I thought you hated my hair.

[Pretty vocally actually. But Keith is getting rid of his own gloves because yeah they're in the way of touching, and he thinks he'd like to do that too.]

[It's okay, Keith. You may be a grumpy kitten, but you're Lance's grumpy kitten now. Lance is a little hesitant before he responds.]

I, uhh... Would you laugh if I said it was me trying to convince myself that I didn't want to touch it?

[Keith can probably live with being exactly that. But he's looking genuinely surprised by the words before well, he does laugh.]

Yeah. Probably.

[More than probably clearly, considering he is laughing. But he's also settling his hands at Lance's hips and stepping in close again.] But... it's a good reason. I like it.